dream joined the dodgeball team i was awful. tiffany vanseust ruined my tryout. it was football dodgeball. we had to watch a movie and take notes did NOT make sense. i make sure to repack HP before we go we leave and i fall flat on my face in the rain in front on a kid from class im running around school? looking for class i guess there is a spider web which controls what time it is. i keep trying to change it, but i HATE spiders so i couldn't

Life update.

So I'm done at the salon in one month and I'm planning on moving up t Long Beach by the first week of June. I'm excited for something new. I'm registering for school and classes right now so hopefully I can get into everything I want. Joey is still randomly texting me, asking me how I'm doing. Who cares... I'm not responding. Eventually he'll quit, right? Luke wants to date me when I move to Long Beach but I don't know how I feel about it yet. Hmm.... What else is new? I've just been hanging out with Mike and Kyle like they're my life support lately. We went up to Julian over the weekend and had a blast. I love those boys. I'm going to Arizona with Ashley for Baby's 7th birthday tomorrow until Sunday :) I'm ecstatic! 

I'm at Panera with Angie right not supposedly doing homework. I'll get back to that now...

Long Beach is full of some of the most amazing people. One thing they made me realize though, is that people could be like that everywhere. I may have just not given them a chance because I myself am the closed off one. Anyway, I'm trying to be better and more open to new situations and experiences. One thing I'm not open to though is going on dates with random guys I'm not into. No thank you..

Los Angeles and Long Beach this weekend with Ash :)

Dream

I was at Joey's house and I was leaning against a bench and Joey had his arm around me. His mom is on the phone with a friend telling them all about Joey's new girl he's dating and how they're going to see the Princess Bride. He slowly moved away from me as he conveniently got on his phone. I looked at him and walked away toward Liam to say goodbye and he started dancing! Like, really dancing! It was amazing. Scene switched to me driving in a car with someone. We're driving super fast and whoever is driving is having some serious rage issues. I see a car next to us hit his child. So we hunt him down. Turns out the guy also beat his wife and ended up killing her. So we find the kids and for some reason make them take shrooms? I guess so they wouldn't think about it. Then its like a party at some taffy/bakery place where Kyle likes to hang out. Everyone is freaking out because Kyle and I hang out a lot. I was over everyone assuming so I finally just kissed him. But I had my retainers in...? There was also a scene where Callyn and Matt got back from there honeymoon which they went on with Nat and jake and 2 other girls... Then it switched again to LOST. I don't remember much, but I was digging through John Locke's stuff looking for gun powder and he walked up and I said "Hi John." and woke up. 

This dream is way weird. 

I forget most of the beginning, but Brian was talking to me at one point about Amanda and why she shouldn't work at the salon anymore. He had Bella (their dog) with him and we were out walking her. That's all I remember about that part.

Scene change and we are on a boat and its like a school scene and people are plotting to hurt other people. This really nice, really cute boy ended up getting killed by this douche bag and I knew that he did it so now he was after me. I'm running an running and he's chasing me up and down tons of stairs. I think I finally got away and I don't remember if I ever hurt him or not? Anyways, I met up with the dead boys parents and they are both artists. I followed his mom out to the water one night and she was painting on the waves. I asked her why she was doing that and she said because her son is in the water and these paintings are for him. Then the wave washed it away.  

At one point there was a bad man doing bad things to all the girls... but I won't get into that. 

My dreams have been revolving around work recently. I got to work and Amanda left, Jess stayed for a second to help me out because there were a lot of people there. I was trying to check this man out and then my computer crashed, I went over to use the other computer and that one freaked out too. The line kept on getting longer and longer and I was getting stressed. So I restarted the computer and left Jess there to handle it on her own. ha

I ran out and kept on running. For some reason I didn't have pants on, only my/his long grey v-neck which acted as a dress. While I'm running up this hill, a car speeds past me followed by a police car. I try to get out of their way and keep trucking. I got to the top and some boys I know were watching the whole thing; mike, russ and others... The police car was crashed into a tree and I couldn't see the other one. The cop got out, straightened his glasses and walked over to the other car. He reminded me of the liquid guy in Terminator...

Scene shift to some sort of play or dance thing? We were all in super weird costumes and I was the photographer for the dancing girls?... haha. I took apart my camera and was holding up this long piece of fabric thinking I can record the play/dancers just by holding it. The costumes glowed in the dark and were covering the people from head to toe. 

Last nights dream:

I was riding home from Leucadia on my motorized bicycle, the ones where you still need to pedal. I was trying to keep up with all the other cars on the freeway. It was National Woody day and every single car on the road was a woody. While I was riding home, I saw a shooting star! It kept coming closer and closer until it touched down right behind me! I was so excited, I needed to call Joey and tell him? So I call him and once I got ahold of him there was a scene change and I was at work. I hadn't clocking in yet so I was in the back calling him and my boss was threatening to fire me if I didn't get off the phone. Meanwhile, on the phone it was not Joey at all, it was a drunk girl named Erin. She was explaining to me how drunk she was and that she threw up on her mom's carpet. She was drunkenly trying to clean it up.

Real Life:

I have been eating Girl Scout Cookies and Hot Tamales for 2 days. I don't remember the last mean I had besides cereal in that time either. I'm very unhealthy this week. I'm going to meet Nate at Knockout and he's treating me to some pizza. I miss him, I hope all is well in his life now.

Quote:

If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got!

I'm starting to have bad dreams again. Last night I had a stalker who was following me at some party and this new girl, Jonah, that I met was helping me avoid the situation. But eventually he was coming towards me but passed right by me and went into the bathroom. He was taking forever and for some reason I couldn't leave the room I was in. Finally the door opened but he wasn't there, after a second he stepped into the opening and was way scary looking, like he had been possessed or something... So then he stalks right by me again and is talking crazy like "help me, I need you to carry me. I need help!" He's yelling this to my Papa. Papa looks at him and is going to help him and then the guy punches Papa in the face and threatens to steal me away! And then I woke up. He punched my grandpa in the face! What kind of craziness is that!I'm nuts.

Transition

First of all, Liam York is the most adorable creature to ever walk the earth. He knows 'metal' or 'rock and roll' fingers.

I've been so upset lately and my dreams have reflected it!
I've dreamed/dreampt? about kissing boys, Zack Morris to be exact. I lost my phone on a train and he was trying to help me find it. I kissed him and when I realized what I was doing, I ran away. I kissed Luke too, but we won't go there. I ran away from him as well.

But now I'm leaning towards this new concept called being happy. I can't liv my life through other people or push what I believe or how I feel on them either.

I'm trying this new thing where I try to accept Joey for who he is and not try to change him. This is a lot harder than one would expect. I am very fond of picking and bickering. But last night, I let him drink. In fact, I allowed him to drink too much. But you know what I found out? He was so much more loving towards me, so in the end, I didn't even mind. But I still have a hard time with it. I mean, make up your mind. Do you want to be good; not get drunk, not be sketch, not cuss? Or do you even care? I feel like Sunday through Tuesday you care and then Wednesday through Saturday you could care less. This is where I am stuck in a rut. Maybe we'll talk about it soon. Probably not. But one thing I can say is that I enjoyed myself tremendously last night and all because I was thinking positively and not dwelling.

Lesson learned: Don't dwell. Be happy.

I worked this morning at the Salon, now I'm going to nap, and then I am shooting El Camino's winter formal! It'll be a grand ol' time with Jeff and Jerri.